Itasaku Story, Crimson Flowers
by ItaSaku302
Summary: Sakura is kidnapped by the akatsuki, and is forced to live with them, but are they really as bad as she's told, and what about Itachi....? Who am i kidding? This is probably the goofiest story you'll ever read!
1. Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1: Troubling Beginnings

CHAPTER 1: Troubling Beginnings

Sakura's Point of view

_I was sprinting down a dark hall as fast as I could run, running from an unknown person. I turned my head around, and saw crimson eyes, shining through the darkness. "Sakura…" He called out, his voice like velvet. For some reason I was very afraid of the person who wielded those eyes, but I couldn't remember who! Sasuke? No, Sasuke wouldn't be chasing me; he's probably dead now anyway. "No! He's not dead! He's Alive!" Inner Sakura screamed in my head. I was so caught up with my thoughts that I forgot the person behind me. Wham! He smashed into me, but caught me before I could hit the ground. Oh no! I thought, what was he going to do? Instead of doing anything like killing me, he leaned down, his nose almost touching mine, he leaned forward a bit more and-_

Nobody in particular's point of view

Sakura shot out of bed, faster than lightning, and almost hit her head on her low ceiling. She was sweating like crazy, and could only hear her pounding heart and the voice "Sakura……" She froze, and then thought, was that him? Oh no, he's here! "Sakura?" Oh my god, I've got to hide! _Rap Tap Tap!_ Someone was knocking at her door! "Sakura!" She snapped back into reality, and could hear the voice of her mom calling "Sakura! Let me in please! Your doors locked!"

"Oh, sorry mom, I was just having a nightmare." She walked over to the door, and unlocked it. Her mom walked in, and handed her a scroll, bound in leather, with strange markings all over it. It's a message from Tsunade; Shizune gave it to me, figuring you were asleep. "Oh, ok, thanks mom."

"Your Welcome honey, oh, and don't forget, you're going out with Naruto and Hinata tonight, to celebrate!"

"Ya, I remember mom." Sakura opened the scroll, it read; _Sakura, please come to my office at 11:32 sharp, I have a special mission for you regarding the capture of Sasuke Uchiha!_

Itachi's point of view

Kisame and I were standing on a ledge, about 92 yards away from the hokage's office. Kisame had a mini-telescope he had bought at one of the local stores, and was looking in the direction of the hot springs. The _women's_ hot springs to be exact. "He he, oh, you're the hot one, aren't you?" He said to no won in particular. I kicked him in the ribs, and said, almost with a hint of humor in my voice, "Kisame, stop being such a pervert! What if someone sees you?" Kisame looked up at me and said "well, if they saw me, I guess I'd have to kill them, then again, I'd probably kill them anyway." Before I could answer he said "Ooo, you sure you don't want to look, this one with the pink hair is hot!" I kicked him harder in the ribs, and said "Kisame! What the fuck did I just tell you?" Kisame frowned at me from where he was squatting down, and said "Hey man, it's not like I could just walk in there with my shirt off and get any chick I want. Just because you can, doesn't mean everybody else can too!" With that he went back to his perverted business. I was about to shoot a mean comment back at him, but I realized, how many kunochi have _pink hair? _"God damnnit Kisame! You little fucktard! She's the one we have been looking for!" Damn, I thought to myself, I'm really losing my cool. "What? Were looking for a chick?" He asked. I slapped my head, and kicked him off the 30ft cliff.

Sakura's point of view

I walked into Tsunade's office, and saw Tsunade, with about 1000 pieces of paper around her, scribbling words onto what looked like a valentine, that said To: Gaara of the Funk From: Tsunade. When she saw me standing in front of her desk, she immediately put the scroll away, and said "Your mission is to infiltrate Orochimaru's village, and get Sasuke to come back, in whatever way you can." When she said Sasuke, Inner Sakura screamed "Yes! Finally, we get to have Sasuke-kun back!" Ya! I thought back, but I was almost unhappy… had I lost all hope in Sasuke? Just as Tsunade was asking me the standard "Do you accept this mission?" thing, I heard a hug crash, and a man with blue skin and a giant sword smashed though the window! Tsunade immediately hopped out of her chair, and threw a punch right at him! Her hand connected with the blue man's face, and I heard a crack, but he didn't even budge, he just smirked. Crash! The other window exploded and another akatsuki member hopped in the room, he was slightly shorter than the blue one, and he had black hair, but his hat was covering his face. I had been training with Tsunade for four years now, and was confident in my skills, so I swung a punch at him, as fast as lightning. His hand shot up, faster than greased lightning, and caught my hand before it even got close to his face. With his other hand, he whipped of his hat, and I starred straight into his eyes…his crimson eyes! I screamed, then fainted, before everything went black, I heard the blue man say in a raspy voice, "Wow Itachi, you used your mangeko on her? Why?" Then I heard Itachi respond in an extremely soft, yet loud, velvety voice "I didn't, she just fainted on her own!"

Sakura's point of view

"Auug" I moaned as I awoke. I was on a bed, in a room painted white, with nothing in it except a table, a window above the bed, and the bed I was laying on. Then the blue man walked in, carrying a tray of food and said "hey, sleeping beauty's waken up! Hahaha!" He laughed at his own joke in his raspy voice. I ignored his comment, and stared hungrily at the tray of food he was holding, I felt like I hadn't eaten in weeks. He seemed to notice me staring, and said "Oh yeah, you must be hungry! Hmm… should I give it to you? Or maybe not?" He laughed, and then set the trey down on the bed. "Oh, and I'm Kisame." He added as an afterthought, before leaving the room. I started devouring the food hungrily, and then realized, it might be poisoned! "Don't worry kunochi, it's not poisoned, why would we capture you, and then poison you?" I heard someone say, I looked over to the door, and saw the man named Itachi, starring at me with…crimson eyes!

Itachi's point of view

"Ahhhhhh!" The kunochi screamed. I jumped back at the sudden noise, as she continued to scream her lungs out. I ran up to her, and clamped my hand over her mouth, and in doing so deactivated my sharingan. When I did that, she immediately stopped screaming. Then I realized that in her screaming, she had accidentally tossed the tray of food up in the air, and it was about to hit the ground! I shot my hand out, and caught it just before it hid the ground. I handed the food back to her, she reached out to take it, and I noticed her hand was still shaking. After she had set the food down on her bed, I noticed how bad she smelled, well, she has been out cold for a whole week. "Ok kunochi" I said "You need a shower, and your in no condition to walk about by yourself, so I'm going to carry you, understand?"


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER 2; Sweet and Kendl

CHAPTER 2; Sweet and Kendl

Sakura's point of view

I nodded my head a couple times, to show that I understood. After I finished nodding, he picked my up. He did this so fast that I didn't even register his action until we were halfway down the hall. We were approaching a door at the end of the corridor; it was painted black and red, as were the halls. The other doors we passed had strange engravings on them, one had what looked like a clay bird, one that had a puppet on it, another a shark, and yet another had a bag, which seemed to be full to the brim with money. When we reached the bathroom door, Itachi kicked it open, and set me down next to a metal bar sticking out of the wall. "You can hold on to that to keep yourself from falling" he said as he motioned with his head toward the bar "You have twenty minutes until I return, I'll have Kisame put some clothes on the counter. And with that, he left. I turned the water on, removed my putrid clothing, and got into the bathtub. I was about 5 minutes into my bath, when I heard voices outside. "So, I heard Itachi has a kunochi hostage, yeah." Said a deep male voice I didn't recognize. "That's right, hey; you want to have some...fun…with her?" Came the raspy voice of the blue man, Kisame. "Hey, why not, yeah?" Uh oh, I thought, what am I going to do now? I was starting to get frantic, as I could see the handle turning…turning…turning-SMASH!-SMASH! After about five seconds I heard Kisame's voice say: "oww, man that really hurts" And then the deeper one say "Oh man Itachi, what the hell was that for, yeah?"

Itachi's point of view

_Rap-Tap-Tap_! I knocked on the bathroom door "Hey kunochi, are you okay?" I asked, my voice totally void of emotion, as always. "Y-yes" came the weak reply. "You have 12 minutes left, don't waste them." I walked back down the hall, and then down the stairs into the kitchen, hoping to find something to eat. What I saw in the kitchen would have made any normal person laugh they're guts out, but I'm not a normal person. I saw Leader with a couple of pancakes on his head, attempting to pour syrup on them, and Konan was standing there with a fork, trying to eat them. All the while Zetsu was standing in the far edge of the kitchen, looking hungrily at Leader's head. And these guys are supposed to be the most terrifying, evil villains alive! "Watch out, Konan, it looks like Zetsu is gonna bite your boyfriend's head off." I said with ought the slightest hint of humor. All three heads turned at me, Leader looked like he was going to die of embarrassment, Konan was laughing her head off, and it looked like Zetsu was going to take the opportunity to eat the pancakes. Zorphchloaacc was the sound it made when Zetsu bit the pancakes off of Leader's head, along with some of his hair. Konan laughed even harder at this and Leader said "Zetsu, if you want to live, maybe you should STOP FUCKING DOING THAT!" Zetsu's white side laughed, and his black side said "Ya? Well maybe if you want to live you should stop looking SO FUCKING TASTY!" Konan laughed so hard that I thought she was going to bust a gut, and all her blue hair was going to fall out.

Diedara's point of view

"Auug" I groaned as I awoke from being knocked unconscious by Itachi. I looked up, to see a pair of green eyes starring back at me. She looked at me strangely, almost inquisitively, and offered a hand to help me up. "So, are you Itachi's hostage, yeah?" I asked after sitting up. "Yeah, I am, I'm also pissed at you for being such a pervert!" I was taken aback by this comment, then I laughed and said "Okay then, hit me, yeah!" She looked surprised, and then smiled. Her smile right then was more evil than I imagined Itachi's smile would be (I say imagine because he never smiles) wa-bam! She smacked me right in the face. The last thing I remember is flying across the hall, and slamming into the wall.

Sakura's point of view

The blond haired man flew across the hall, and I punched the air triumphantly. Then I saw Itachi come up the stairs, he must have heard the crash, I thought. He looked at the blond, then at me, and in half a second picked me up, and was carrying to my room. It was then I realized how tired I was, that punch took a whole lot of chakra.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: The good, the bad, and the gender confused

Chapter 3: The good, the bad, and the gender confused.

Itachi's POV

As I carried the kunochi to her bedroom I noticed she was sleeping, and that she had snuggled up my chest. "Eh…" I sighed, normally if someone was to snuggle up to me, I'd either kill them, or toss them on the ground. But for some reason, this kunochi was somehow snuggling up the infamous Itachi Uchiha, and living. That's quite a feat! I joked to myself. By this time we had reached her room, and I laid her down on the bed.

Suddenly, I got an urge to get in the bed with her. I scarred myself with that thought so deeply that I ran out of the room. **(A/n: sorry about the OOCness, I just couldn't figure out a way to make him leave. Hehe.)**

Sasuke's POV

"Itachi!" I yelled as I rammed my third chirdori of the day into the mountainside. "Hehe, take that Kakashi!" thought to myself, more than two chidori's will kill you my ass! Zpppp the virtual reality trainer turned off, and Orochimaru walked into the room. "Sasuke….it seems your beloved Sakura has been captured by…." He trailed off, probably just to get me to ask, by whom. "By who?" I said, not really caring. "…Uchiha Itachi…" he murmured. "Guh…wa….bu…" I stuttered, trying to think of something to say. "I expect you will want to go get her now…now that you know who captured her…." He said. "Hell yes! I'm going to go slaughter him!" I roared, much more exited that I would have an excuse to kill my brother. I didn't even bother grabbing my sword, or resting or anything; I just flew out of the door. "Sasuke! Don't forget to rescue that beautiful kunochi!" he yelled back at me Huh, I thought, beautiful kunochi? It wasn't so much the thought of him wanting me to get her, more of the, wow, I always thought he was gay!

Gaara's POV

I was in konaha on a vacation (actually on probation for killing somebody) talking to Naruto, Rock Lee, Kiba, and Shino when I felt it… "Guys…" I said "huh, what is it Gaara?" Naruto said "well….Gaara sense tingling!" They all gasped in shock. "N-no!" Naruto exclaimed. "Yes…." I said quietly. "No! Not them! Sasuke's gone! There's nobody here that attracts them!" Rock Lee yelled. "Well….actually… I do…" I murmured. Once again, everybody gasped in shock. "Please don't mean…them!" Kiba howled. "yes..." I said, "FANGIRLS!" I yelled just as about 90000000000000000 of them came running at us, all holding we love Gaara signs.

Sakura's POV

"Hmm?" I said as I woke from another "crimson dream"** (A/n: as in a dream about Itachi)** I slowly got up, and walked over to the door. I opened it up, and walked into the hall, surprised that nobody stopped me. I could hear sounds of pots and pans banging around downstairs. I was contemplating whether our not to walk down there, when I heard Itachi's Voice say "Would you like some breakfast, kunochi?" He asked, almost with a hint of Humor in his voice. "

Itachi's POV

"Ahh!" The kunochi squealed, and then jumped a couple inches in the air. "No…I'm ok" the kunochi said. "Grrrr" came her stomach's reply. She blushed as she said "Okay, well…maybe a little…" I smirked, then led her down to the kitchen……**(A/n: what kind of insane antics will the akatsuki pull at breakfast time? Read the next chapter to find out! PS: Sorry about the lack of ItaSaku, and the short chapters, I'm just building up to something big!**


	4. BONUS EPISODE! PART 1!

BONUS EPISODE

BONUS EPISODE!!

BONUS EPISODE!!

BONUS EPISODE!!

BONUS EPISODE!!

BONUS EPISODE!!

BONUS EPISODE!!

BONUS EPISODE!!

BONUS EPISODE!!

Sex Ed. With Itachi

"Ok children, today were going to learn about…..SEX!" Kakashi half yelled to the entire class. Sakura, Naruto, Sai, Kiba, Shino, Hinata, Ino, Shikamaru, Chouji, Tenten, and all the other people burst out laughing. "Quite children, sex is a very serious matter!" Kakashi interrupted. Everybody was still laughing except for Sasuke and Ino, Sasuke because he was emo and Ino because she was eying Shikamaru. "Alright, alright, now everybody just quite down, and will start our lesson for today." Everybody quieted down, and listened intently. "Alright, so-"Kakashi was cut of by some noise outside of the classroom. SPOILER ALERT!! DON'T READ THE NEXT SENTENCE IF YOU DON'T WANNA SPOILER! "No Kisame, I'm not evil, in fact, I massacred the Uchiha clan because I was ordered to!" Everybody in the classroom gasped, and Kakashi, for some reason unknown to mankind, passed out.

THE LEGENDARY SEIGE OF GAARA CASTLE (AKA SUNA)

_Dear lord Gaara, the enemy has breached the walls of our castle, we have to retreat!_

_They have taken all of the Gaara themed objects we had! They even took some of the Naruto themed objects! We will be there shortly to help you lift the siege! Till then, my lord… _Gaara closed the parchment, and tossed it into the wind. The fools… The enemy had already breached Suna's walls as well, he, Naruto, Kiba, and Shino were all hiding in the inner walls, hoping that by some miracle they would be saved. "Gaara!" someone calling his name broke his train of thought. He turned to see it was Naruto. "Yes?" He asked. "The-e…They…They have breached the walls, and they're scaling the kazakge tower! "NO!" I yelled. "My...My lord... I can hold them off while you escape..." I looked up at him, Naruto, my best friend… BOOM! The battering ram smashed against the gate. "Run!" Naruto screamed.

Back to Kakashi. w00t! Itachi's POV

I walked into the classroom full of students, and was surprised that they didn't run away. As if somehow reading my mind, the Pink Haired girl said "We heard what you said…" I smirked, then looked down at the unconscious figure of Kakashi, laughed and said jokingly " Guess I'll be your new sex ed teacher!" At that, every girl in the classrooms face turned red, and I smirked again

THE LEGENDARY SIEGE OF GAARA CASTLE (PART 2)

I staggered up the the burning ruble that used to be the great kazakage tower. Covered with blood, wounds gaping and reddish purple, I fell to the ground. Then, I saw what I was looking for. "N-…NARUTO!" I Screamed as I saw his bloody and mangled body lying on the top of the ruble. "no…" I whispered. Naruto had given his life to save me…

I crawled over to him, dragging my wounds against the ground, but I didn't care. I managed to get to him, and then I saw what they did to him. They had RAPED him! Then I saw them…. They're never ending army was advancing on me fast, but I could care less. "NAAAAAAAAAARUTOOOOO!" I yelled, pure chakra pouring out of my body. I was in a rage, I stood up, despite the pain. "AHHHHH!" I screamed as the chakra left my body, engulfing the army, and exploding. "YOU WANT ME? **THEN COME AND GET ME!"** Me and shakaku yelled simultaneously. And with that, they were all dead. I fell to the ground, the last of my energy fading away, my last words were…"Damn you…FANGIRLS!"


	5. BONUS EPISODE! PART 2!

Bonus episode part 2

Bonus episode part 2

Sex ed class Sakura's POV

"OK, so, I'd like everybody to tell me everything they know about sex!" Itachi exclaimed

Half the girls blushed, and everybody else turned a little pink. Nobody said anything. "Oh! So nobody knows anything! I see… well then I'll just sing a song to explain it!"

There were a couple groans from around the classroom, but Itachi ignored it. He pulled out a walkie talkie, and said into it; "Akatsuki code yellow, Konaha classroom!" Within seconds Deidara, Kisame, and Sasori all spontaneously appeared in the classroom. "Ok!, ready guys?" Itachi questioned. "Yea" they all responded. Poof! Two guitars, a drum set, and a microphone appeared out of nowhere they picked up they're respective instruments (Itachi: microphone, Kisame and Dei: Guitars, Sasori: Drums) and started they're song;

"1, 2, 3, 4!" Itachi yelled

Well it rains and it pours  
When you're out on your own  
If I crash on the couch  
Can I sleep in my clothes?  
'Cause I've spent the night dancing  
I'm drunk, I suppose  
If it looks like I'm laughing  
I'm really just asking to leave

This alone, you're in time for the show  
You're the one that I need  
I'm the one that you loathe  
You can watch me corrode like a beast in repose  
'Cause I love all the poison  
Away with the boys in the band

I've really been on a bender and it shows  
So why don't you blow me a kiss before she goes?

Give me a shot to remember  
And you can take all the pain away from me  
A kiss and I will surrender  
The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead  
A light to burn all the empires  
So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be  
In love with all of these vampires  
So you can leave like the sane abandoned me

There's a place in the dark where the animals go  
You can take off your skin in the cannibal glow  
Juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands  
Drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands, Romeo

I've really been on a bender and it shows  
So why don't you blow me a kiss before she goes?

Give me a shot to remember  
And you can take all the pain away from me  
A kiss and I will surrender  
The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead  
A light to burn all the empires  
So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be  
In love with all of these vampires  
So you can leave like the sane abandoned me

Oh!

Give me a shot to remember  
And you can take all the pain away from me  
A kiss and I will surrender  
The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead  
A light to burn all the empires  
So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be  
In love with all of these vampires  
So you can leave like the sane abandoned me

Oooooo, Oooooo, Oooooo yeah, Oooooo

When the song was over, Deidara, Kisame, Sasori, and all of the instruments disappeared. Everybody was staring in awe at Itachi, surprised that he copied the song exactly. Even the voices! And then, of course, Naruto points out the obvious; "That song didn't have anything to do with sex!"


	6. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Me: O rly? Cody: Ya rly!

Itachi's POV

I led the pink haired kunochi down the stairs, toward the kitchen. As we slowly walked down the stairs I realized that my hand was still on her shoulder, and I quickly pulled away. When we were almost at the bottom step, I could here voices. "No, Deidara, I won't put it on!" Came Sasori's voice. "But you have to, un!" Came the deep voice of Deidara. And then we walked into the kitchen. I almost laughed at what they were doing, note the _almost_ in that sentence. Sakura started giggling, and Sasori slapped Deidara. "B-u-but" Deidara stuttered, holding up the tutu. **(A/n: that's right, tutu. If you didn't catch that, Deidara is trying to make Sasori wear a tutu.) **Sakura burst out laughing, and I chuckled a little. Deidara's head snapped to me, and he stared at me, mouth open and gaping. "D-d-did you just _laugh?_" Deidara asked with such emphasis on the word laugh that it started Sakura on another giggling fit. "Hn" I replied. "Hehe, I never knew that the infamous akatsuki were such funny guys!" Sakura giggled some more at Deidara's reaction to this. "No way! We can't let this girl live! If we ransom her back she'll spread the word about your idiocy, Deidara!" Sasori said, "Then again, we could just kill _you_ Deidara"

Sakura's POV

I giggled even more when I heard this. These akatsuki guys couldn't be mass murderers! They were so funny! When I was finally done with my giggling fit, I took a good look around the room. I gasped at how beautiful everything was, it looked like a kage mansion, not a serial killer hideout. "Don't mind these idiots, Sakura" I heard Itachi say from behind me. "Hey! I'm not an idiot! I-" Sasori was cut of by a child like voice. "SEMPIA!" a man with an orange mask ran into the room, and hugged the man named Deidara. "Oh god Tobi, could you leave me alone for 2 freaking seconds?" At this Tobi giggled, and started poking Deidara's hair. "Would you stop that, un?!" He yelled. "Hehe, never!" Tobi replied childishly. I had to admit, the one with the Orange mask didn't really fit with a band of mass murderers. **Yeah, he belongs in day-care.** Inner Sakura commented. More like a mental hospital, I thought. My train of thought was cut off by a man with brown hair, and things on his nose which looked like snakebites walked into the room. "Attention! Akatsuki assemble!" He said. Deidara and Sasori straightened up, and Itachi tensed up. Poof! Two people appeared in the room. One of them looked like a priest, and had a scythe. He had his hair pulled back as well, which seemed kind of strange. The other one had his entire body covered, and a mask like Kakashi's. Poof! Poof! Kisame and a blue haired girl appeared. The blue haired girl had a blank expression on her face, and a paper rose in her hair. Zuzuzuzu. A man formed up from the ground. He had a half white half black face, and what looked like a venus fly trap attached to his head. "Gah!" I exclaimed as I saw him. The black half glared at me, and the white half stuck its tongue out.

Tobi's POV (Tobi's a good boy...NOT!)

Fufufufu, I thought to myself. This kunochi might be of use, I might be able to use her to distract that Uchiha brat enough so that I can kill him with ought a fight. After I use him to get revenge on konaha, of course. Fufufufu! I am so evil! Wait, why am I evil again? Oh yeah, because I'm going to use this girl to betray an emo kid! Damn 80 year old senile brain! Oh well, at least I still look like I'm twenty! w00t! Wait, how old am I again?** A/n: Lulz, I couldn't resist putting this in)**

Itachi's POV

This has to be serious, as Pein is calling a special meeting, I thought to myself. "Alright Akatsuki members, today we'll be doing a mission that we all participate in!" Deidara gasped at this statement. "This mission will be so heart-wrenchingly hard, that by the end of this, half of you will probably be dead, and the rest will be severely wounded!" Pein said quietly. Oh yeah, this was really serious. "This mission's name is…operation make breakfast!" Pein exclaimed. "Oh god, no!" Sasori gasped out. Deidara was on the floor passed out, Kakazu was frantically counting his money, and Hidan was praying to Jashin.

Konan shuddered, remembering the last time they had attempted to make breakfast.

FLASHBACK NO JUTSU

"_Sasori, do I put this in this pot?" Deidara asked. "No, you put _this _in that pot" Sasori replied. Then he dropped it in the pot and…BOOM! Half of the akatsuki base was ruined, and most of the apprentices were dead._

END FLASHBACK NO JUTSU

Sakura's POV

The extremely dangerous mission was to make breakfast? "Hahaha!" I rolled on the floor laughing. Pein looked at me, and then screamed "You think this isn't serious? Do you know how much bloody carnage the akatsuki has caused over the years trying to make breakfast?" He screamed. "Look, if it's that bad, I'll just make it" I said. And with that, I proceded to make breakfast. They all gaped at me as I opened the fridge and pulled out some eggs.

Tobi's POV

Wait….who am I again?

**A/n: lolz! What crazy things will happen now that Sakura is making the akatsuki's breakfast? Read the next chappy to find out! If you read plz review! It would make me super happy! :D**


	7. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Rock you like a hurricane

Chapter 5: Rock you like a hurricane! (AKA Deidara's Episode)

Deidara's POV (Well duh it _is_ Deidara's Episode!)

We all stood there, staring at her as our captive, Sakura, preformed the most dangerous mission the Akatsuki had ever undertaken! Operation: Make Breakfast! "Deidara? What do you want? Eggs or Pancakes?" The insanely powerful girl's voice broke my train of thought (more like my train of awe). "umm… aren't those both American foods?" I asked her. "Yes" She stated flatly. "Ummm… okay… how about eggs, un?" She smiled, and set about finding out what the others wanted.

Tobi (Mwahaha! I'm so evil that I'm taking up Deidara-Sempia's episode time!)

As the child walked around taking people's "orders", I slowly crept out of the room, and up to the room where all of the Bijou were stored. Wait, what are the Bijou again? Oh yeah, evil demon things…or something. Why the hell do they have so many freaking tails? Doesn't that get in the way when they're fighting? And why am I trying to capture them? Oh yeah! So me, the evil Madara Uchiha, can take over the world! Mwahahaha! Wait, what the hell is a Madara Uchiha?

Deidara's POV

Ewww. Hidan smells like chili, I thought as I stood in line for my food. I noticed that Itachi was the only one already eating. Damn him and his smexyness! He always get's things first! Hmm. Or maybe it's because he's an evil serial killer. Hmmm. Could be both. Finnaly it was my turn. I grabed my eggs and toast and sat down next to Sasori, (He's a puppet, he doesent need food) I picked up my toast, it smeeled so good, I closed my eyes, and slowly brought it up to my mouth, took a big bite of… nothing? I jerked open my eyes to realize that there was no toast in my hands. "What the hell?" I exclaimed. I shook my head slowly, and picked up my fork, stabbed my eggs, brought it to my mouth…and…SLUUURP! The fork and the eggs were suddenly gone. "Ahh!" I yelled, and ran out of the room, knocking over tables on my way out the door.

Sasuke's POV

As I jumped from treetop too treetop, I thought of Sakura, and how I had left her, as well as Konaha, that night…

FLASHBACK! (Itachi: oh god, not another one! Deidara: Have a flashback on your won time, un!)

"_nd so Sasuke, that's why we neeeever put Swedish fish in our ears!"_

END FLASHBACK

Crap, wrong flashback, let me try again…

FLASHBACK!

"_Sasuke! Please don't leave me!" Sakura shouted as I walked away. "Sasuke, I've always loved you! Because…umm…because uhhh…well…I umm…well…" Sakura trailed off. "You know what? If you freakin want to leave so badly go ahead, I don't even care any more!" Sakura screamed. I was surprised at this, as this isn't what happened in the anime, or the manga. "Umm…well…uhh…" Think Sasuke! Improvise! I thought to myself. "Sakura…" I whispered. "Your annoying!"_


End file.
